There are big problems in the world, and I’ve seen a lot of them up close. I’m talking about actual starving people, or actual people dying from malaria (real malaria, not the stuff I pretend to have), and other actual people with actual life-threatening issues.

On the other end of the scale, however, are my problems. One of which happened this morning, when I grabbed a pair of socks and discovered a big-a$$ hole in the heel of one of them. This was profoundly upsetting to me, for two reasons: 1) I don’t like wearing socks with big-a$$ holes in them, and 2) in light of the first paragraph of this post, it seems petty. It seems petty, because, well, it IS petty.

So for the record, let me just say 3 things:

1. I do care about sick, poor, starving people and am in fact doing things to help with that stuff;

2.  I also hate holes in my socks. I hate it with the burning passion of 10,000 suns;

3.  It may be time to go to Target. Today.

**Note – special thanks to the retired Pets.com Sock Puppet for the guest appearance today.