What Would Jesus List?

A good friend of mine has noticed a recent plethora of “Top Ten Lists” among the blogs of his friends, family and church members. This friend has gone so far as to write “Eleven Reasons to Stop Making Top 10 Lists.” To read this rant, please click

I respectfully disagree. And I feel strongly that Jesus himself, if he were here today, would be using this powerful, creative communication method. Parables were so first century; Top Ten Lists are now.

To demonstrate, here are Jesus’ Top Ten Top Ten Lists:

10. Top ten reasons to allow Starbucks in the synagogue.

9. Top ten reasons why “The Message,” although an imperfect translation, wouldn’t exactly kill you to read.

8. Top ten spiritual issues that can’t be resolved in Forty Days.

7. Top ten Old Testament passages most people don’t know, but should become familiar with.

6. Top ten concerns I have with country music.

5. Top ten bizzarre books sold at Family Christian Store.

4. Top ten bizzarre statements made on Christian Television – just this week.

3. Top ten poses and seating arrangements attempted at the ‘Last Supper” before finally deciding to put everyone on the same side of the table, for the portrait you’re all familiar with.

2. Top ten ways to get the fish smell off of your clothing after miraculously helping the incompetent disciples catch a very large amount of the floppy, slimy suckers.

and the #1 Top Ten List Jesus would write….

1. Top ten reasons to avoid Ovation guitars!


About Miller Piano Services

I offer piano tuning, repair and maintenance in the Los Angeles and Orange County areas.
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5 Responses to What Would Jesus List?

  1. joannmski says:

    LOL. Right. And who can argue with the Exodus 20 point?

  2. joannmski says:

    Also, I don’t think #6 would make the list. Country music is the one music that consistently talks about God in a positive way.

  3. Charley says:

    That may be true, but it’s just so darn whiny.

  4. nomi says:

    know what country music may just be the dern best type of music in the whole dang world charlie.
    p.s. grrrrrrrrrrrr!

  5. Perry says:

    Well, I think Jesus would like Top Ten Reasons We Are Not Living In the Last Days, but of course that’s my preterist bias.

  6. joannmski says:

    Well, the Psalms are fairly whiny too. Perhaps David was accompanied by a banjo.

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