No, the above title isn’t the name of a mariachi band. It’s an actual problem taking place right here in California. News reports tell us that we have too many chihuahuas. Apparently they’ve figured out exactly how many chihuahuas it’s OK to have, and we’ve gone past that number.

I’m just going to be up front here… I’m not a fan of the chihuahuas. I am, as many of you know, a fan of dogs in general. But not so much the chihuahuas. I know this is hard for some of you, who for whatever reason, like the *freaky little monsters. I’ll even go so far to say that there is one chihuahua named Rocko over in Torrance, who I have kind of a casual friendship with – but only because I like his family. Were I to just meet Rocko randomly out someplace, however, I don’t think I’d be all that interested in getting to know him.

*Freaky little monsters… Sorry, but I don’t know how else to describe them. Those are the first words that came to mind when I heard the news a few days ago. Then as it turned out, I was listening to talk radio that night, and the woman talking was referring to the same news story, and she seems to share my feelings about the little wanna-be dogs. Only she was a bit stronger, referring to them as “freaky little bas**rds.”

Here are just a few of the qualities that make the chihuahuas freaky…

They’re anxious, to the point of shaking;

They’re mean – possibly because of the anxiety;

They feel like they’re going to break when you pet them. In the news story I linked above, a chihuahua advocate said, “They (the chihuahuas) can be abused by people of all sizes.” I think he meant this as a bad thing, not as a selling point.

They have this weird kind of sideways running thing. Not that the sideways running thing is all that bad in and of itself, but combined with the other stuff, it’s just annoying.

So I’m not saying we should wipe out all the existing chihuahuas. Just stop breeding the freaky little monsters/bas**rds. If we stop making them, then in about 10 years or so, we should be pretty much out of them. Maybe even sooner, since they aren’t especially durable dogs.

I guess all I’m trying to say is the concept of “too many chihuahua” isn’t new. We reached that point when the first chihuahua was bred. It’s time to stop.